Bettering myself and being the best person I can be is extremely important to me. These past couple of years I've been a self-development-aholic. I've come a long way and learned many things. And still, I have so far to go.
One of the things I've learned is that we are never quite "finished." We don't suddenly become the best people we can be and then stay that way. Old habits don't magically disappear. Feelings won't start to elude us.
And one day comes the hard realization: We will never be "finished."
And that's okay.
Something that I'm constantly working on is not talking down to myself when I'm not how I want myself to be. I shouldn't want to be anything different from how I am in the first place.
Accepting yourself in the moment does not mean you are not trying to better yourself. In fact, only by accepting yourself can you better yourself.
Resisting feelings only makes them worse.
We can become so focused on perfecting ourselves that we forget that we are already perfect--in our own imperfect way. Having feelings is not a flaw. Resisting said feelings is what creates the problem.
It's okay to feel anxious. It's okay to feel angry. It's okay to feel sad. Only when we accept our feelings can we respond to them the way we'd like. Because feeling anxious does not equal freaking out nor does feeling angry equal punching someone in the face. When we accept our feelings, we can respond to them with peace.
On the other hand, if we resist the present moment and try to push it away, we create tension. Anxiety becomes panic, and anger becomes rage. If it's physical pain we are fighting, it will become even more hurtful. Every moment we resist can become the worst experience.
Because what matters is not what the moment holds, but how we react to it. If we accept it or not.
Everything in life becomes much worse if we don't want to accept it.
Resisting life only makes everything a bad experience.
There are two ways to live life: In resistance or in acceptance. I've used this metaphor before, but I'll use it again: Life is like a train. We can either ride it in peace or keep freaking out over everything.
There are so many reasons we can get upset: We don't know where the train is going, we are not in control of what we pass, even the seats can be uncomfortable. But nothing we can do will change any of those. So why not sit on the train in peace instead of ruining our own experience? We cannot change anything else, only our own attitude.
So let's ride that train with our feet up and a smile. Whatever the journey holds, who cares? Nothing and no one can take away the comfortable position we choose to sit in.
So which kind of person are you? The one who accepts or the one who resists? Whatever your answer, the good news is, you can be whichever you want to be from the next moment on.
“Always say “yes” to the present moment. What could be more futile, more insane, than to create inner resistance to what already is?” - Eckhart Tolle